Advice for Getting Through “Big Life Stuff”

What is “big life stuff”?

It’s events in your life that make you…

  • panic and fall into a heap on the floor…
  • not eat for days…
  • get a migraine headache…
  • want to run away from home!

Trying to cope with a divorce, a death, a job loss, a betrayal, a career change, can be debilitating.

Getting through it can be tricky, and some ways work better than others.

So, I wanted to share my advice, just in case you are going through “big life stuff” now or in the future.

  • You are not alone.
    • Even if you don’t know of anyone who is going through the same thing you are, know for sure that there are other people out there with similar issues.  While they may not be EXACTLY the same as yours, simply by asking if they have experienced something like what you are going through can be comforting.   Ask a person you trust.  Who will not blab to everyone.  But just asking (maybe for a friend) can help you understand and communicate your feelings.
  • Take it “one day at a time”.
    • Sounds corny, but my advice is don’t think about the future until it’s here.  When it happens, deal with it on that day or the next day.  You can’t change the past.
  • Laugh about it.
    • If you know of someone who is (or has) gone through the same thing you are, have a big old belly laugh about the craziness of it all.
  • Do some “self-caring” stuff.
    • I remember when I found out my “starter husband” was cheating on me.  Sending her flowers using my credit card.  My girlfriend called me and said, “I’m coming to pick you up and we are going to a spa!”  But, I wanted to stay home and wallow in self-pity.  That spa trip—taking care of me—made a huge different in my thinking and my attitude!  Take care of yourself first!
  • Know that it will get better.
    • Whenever something crappy happens in your life, know that it will get better. You become more understanding of other people who have gone through it.  You become more empathetic. Resilient.

Like a stone in a swift-running creek, you will become smoother.  Getting rid of the bumps.  And more beautiful than ever before.